Ma'am! You can't park there!
Hi, I’m Daniel Wagner from the Patriot Punk Network, giving you the latest Tennessee news in 3 minutes or less.
This is our Today in Tennessee Segment brought to you by Precision Seal Coating and Asphalt. Driveway crumbling? That's your own Asphalt. But these guys can fix it.
Let's go!
Round 1
Tennessee just made it easier for some pregnant women to get disabled parking permits, and it did it by literally rewriting the definition of “disabled driver” in state law.
House Bill 1457/Senate Bill 1684, now signed by Governor Bill Lee, amends Tennessee Code Annotated 55‑21‑102 so that a “disabled driver” also includes anyone in their second or third trimester of pregnancy, as well as someone whose pregnancy a doctor certifies as high‑risk.
I'm sure there's an *excellent* "women are such bad drivers that Tennessee had to reclassify them" joke in there, but I won't say it because I quite like living, thank you!
Anyway, this change means those women can qualify for temporary accessible parking placards under the same system the state already uses for other disabilities.
But if you think about it for just a moment, why did we need this law exactly?
Imagine if some a-hole without a handicap placard pulls into a spot and out penguin waddles a very pregnant young lady… who in ALL OF TENNESSEE is gonna be brave enough to berate them for parking there??
Round 2
You want the good news or the bad news first?
I'll start with the good news.
NewsChannel 9 reported that a Tennessee mom, Ashley Blair, was flying on a Delta flight to Portland, Oregon, when she went into labor about 30 minutes before landing.
Two paramedics who happened to be on board stepped in, and with no obstetrics (ob-STET-riks) kit, they improvised with blankets from passengers and even a shoelace to tie off the umbilical cord as the Boeing 737 came in for landing.
Blair’s daughter, Brielle Renee Blair, was born just before the plane touched down, weighing about five and a half pounds and arriving roughly two weeks ahead of her due date.
Airport fire and rescue crews met the flight at the gate, and both mom and baby were taken to a Portland hospital, where officials said they were healthy after the emergency mid‑air delivery.
The bad news?
Ashley can no longer park in Tennessee’s handicap accessible parking spots.
Sorry Ash. 🤷♂️
That's 2 rounds down and 1 to go, and if you're new here, tell us how you found our content.
Round 3
Clarksville Police say they’ve identified the suspect in a recent aggravated burglary caught on camera.
The case stems from a break‑in at a home on Northridge Drive sometime late the night of April 21, where officers say a thin man in red shorts and a white shirt forced his way in and stole a PlayStation 5 and a controller.
Because, priorities, right?
Surveillance images circulated by CPD showed the suspect, described as a thin Black male with a bald head and what appears to be a “lil pimp” tattoo
After the images went out, police say the man was identified, though they’re not releasing further information yet.
Good thing he grabbed the DualSense controller, because the one thing this plan of his didn't seem to have was any sense at all!
Bonus!
And to round out our TITS, a PSA from CapablePersimmons5988: "If you're attending a school event for your children, please dress appropriately. Nobody wants to see you busting out of your clothes."
That was your Tennessee news roundup.
For more deep dives into local stories, watch the Patriot Punkcast on Rumble every Sunday and Wednesday at 7pm CST. Thanks for checking out our TITS — see you Monday!
Get that project that you've been putting off completed ASAP!